Oh Batman!

Chatting with: RLSH Captain Ozone

I think I feel somewhat violated after this chat session. I believe I will just let White Skull and Crimson Nematode keep Captain Ozone to themselves.

Is this guy for or against the environment... I am confused?

PK: BWAHAHAH Captain Ozone! I just peed in the river.. take that!
CO: That's only natural, Nature Boy!
PK: Nooooo foiled again! Curse you Captain Ozone!
CO: Just make sure that you bring a shovel and unbleached TP with you when you have to go BM in the woods.
How many times a day to you go BM, Jebediah?
An apple a day helps!
PK: I might have to dig a pretty big hole... I just ripped off like 6 Hostess Twinkies from some kids... it was cool.. I was all like BWAHAHA and they were all like "Oh no my Hostess Twinkies!"
CO: LOL
What a bunch of cry babies.
PK: I know like seriously right? I don't even like these damn things.... rules of villainy suck sometimes.
CO: You should crawl down some chimneys this year and steal a few of the kids' presents.
They don't need any NEW toys anyways.
PK: No way... I saw Gremlins... I would die in a Santa Suit after breaking my neck... gross
CO: They should be downsizing and playing with used, recycled toys this years, the little pricks.
PK: I fondly remember my 4th Ubermas celebration.. I was given a broken glass jar full of rusty nails... ah the memories!
CO: You were privileged.
I got a paper bag full of dog s#it that was lit on fire on my porch on Ubermas.
PK: Well at least it was ecologically sound.
CO: The flames were emitting sulfur oxides.
I want revenge...but who to?
On the lighter side of things, did you get your Xmas shopping done?
PK: Ubermas... oh yes.... I threw rocks at squirrels for six hours.... I think I hurt my arm.
CO: I shot a couple of squirrels when I went quail hunting last summer and I forgot to throw them on the barbecue with my trout and quail, so I tossed them in the lake in the morning. They're just invasive little pests anyways.
PK: That's neat... we have a lot in common.
CO: Indeed.
Only I hate you.
Just joshing LOL
YOu're a dastardly man, so I have to beware.
PK: Well I am evil...
CO: Yeah, well I'm a sociopath.
PK: Do you want to be my BFFL?
CO: Does that have something to do with puke?
What is BFFL?
PK: I am not sure.. you are like Swedish or something... I forget all those old Captain Ozone Comics blurr together... I think you kicked the crap out of a lumberjack once...
CO: No, I sodomized a lumberjack though.
He had pretty, perky pink cheeks.
I'm half Greek ya know.
And half Irish.
PK: I'm half n half with 2 sugars
CO: Lumps of sugar?
Oh, I get you. Uh-huh.
PK: Have you ever read my evil rantings... I am good at that being a class 3 meta villain and all...
CO: Send me your URL, Bubba.
PK: You like it forsure! I am like the Dear Abby of evil and s#it!
http://evilsupremepizza.blogspot.com/
CO: Can I write to you sometime? I need help.
PK: OMG! I was thinking like the same thing!
CO: I've seen your website before. You wrote some nasty things about me a couple of times. Just for that, I'm going to sodomize you.
PK: What like totally no way! Iz never even talked about youse except for that blog talk radio show where I said I wanted to make you cry by not recycling!
CO: Bulls#it! I'm stepping out for a smoke
PK: Oh no! I get it.. you read my April 1st post and thought it was real... that was April Foolz dude!
Smoking outside hurts the Ozone.

Captain Ozone is offline

Ubermas is Nigh

What a wonderful time of the season to be in the dark, evil, and macob mind that makes being a Meta Villain so rewarding.

I have made my list of demands written with quill on 200 year old parchment paper to the Dark God Krelm to offer quick painless deaths to all my enemies.

I put all the mail box flags up on my street to let others celebrate the holiday with me.. and I hate the mail man.

I have mailed off my no stamp required envelope's to my revenuers with holiday cards and various expired coupons from the minute saver... still hate the mail man.

Five Cornish game hens have been secured for "The Night of the Hen" and will be devoured as the bell tolls midnight on the climax of Ubermas eve.

This might in fact be the bestest Ubermas ever yet!

To everyone a malevolent Ubermas and I hate each and every one of you.

-PK

Batman is Fabulous

Broken Hearted...

I will be taking some time off to emotionally recover from this experience. Ash Grey.. you broke my heart!

AG: cats in the cradle
PK: Silver Spoons was a tv show!
How ye fare, well? Good hero?
AG: that old guy was one ugly dude
PK: I believe you are thinking of Different Strokes.
AG: could be, I am tired
PK: It's ok.. I understand... so what's up safety pup?
AG: justdrama all over the place, what about you?
PK: Just keeping children in line... normal stuff.... ohh I found a dollar bill on the ground today!
AG: keep it?
PK: Sure did! Was on the side of the road by a side walk.
I did a happy dance and everything!
AG: sweet, candy bar time
PK: Wow... yer good... I actually purchased a Skor Bar.
AG: SKOR!!!
as in score!!
PK: LOL
That was funny!
So what's up with your drama? Wanna talk?
AG: no, my face is funny, the skor is serious
PK: Unless you just wanted to drop a Harry Chapin song title at me?
AG: taxi
PK: It's Always Sunny
AG: cant rain all the time
PK: Throw momma from the Train?
AG: right turn Clyde
PK: Is your little image a skull or something?
AG: it is my mask (partially)
PK: Oh.. ok looks kinda like a half skull to me.. like a photo reverse with the colors.
AG: I can see that. cool observation., but no, just my mask.modified from an old batman mask
PK: Hmmmm... BWAHAHAH! Really a Batman mask? That's funny!
AG: kinda is.
PK: Hmmm wheels are turning.... you could reformat and become a RLSV know as "Black Death".. very cool!
Do a plague theme!
Big black 1970's car... lot's of Rob Zombie music.. bad ass!
AG: I have a friend that is RLSV and does that kind of thing
PK: Are you cheating on me? Are you seeing another RLSV on the side? I want to know!
AG: yes. but by rights I am cheating on him. we have known each other since 5th grade
PK: I am only into monogamy... I am not sure if I can take this swinging life style of yours! Does he even know about me?
AG: nope, your the other one, lol.
PK: I think we need to take some time off from this relationship... I need to think about things...
AG: if you want, but I have other Rlsv friends that would like to meet you, haha
Ima swingin rlsv all over the place
you ok?

Poop Knife is offline

I know what you know but you don't know what I know to a common point of understanding... is that my hat?

Not sure if this was a "real" conversation or just some master undertaking by the Thunder Hawks to probe my mind. Either way this conversation did happen... name protected under the "nah nah stick your head in doo doo" act of 1954.

Pk: Hi!
New: hello there
Pk: WHo the heck are you?
New: i'm new
I just discovered the rlsh community
Pk: Well then... welcome to the crazy train... my name is Professor Marvel!
New: thank you!
Pk: Do you like Tacos?
New: I feel like I belong
yes, I like tacos
Pk: Good.... we all do! If you did not that would have become a problem.
New: haha
I take it you're a RLSV
Pk: Who me? Nah no way bro... I am a midget trapped in a horse!
Ahhh no but ya got me... I am a RLSV.
New: haha. well you're the first RLSV I've talked with
Pk: Really no way! Crap... I should have been doing more BWAHAHAHA stuff....
New: have you thwarted any superhero efforts lately?
Pk: I thinks we need to know a little a little bit more about you.... hero! So what's your thing?
New: I plan to start with charity work, maybe do some cleaning up of graffiti. I have to thwart the vandals.
Thwart violence if I see any
Pk: So you are going to go down and volunteer at a homeless outreach shelter? Don't mess with Graffiti... the Geist and others can tell you about that.
New: whatever stuff I can find
I'll have to ask Geist about that then
I haven't tried to do it before
Pk: Who makes Graffiti?
tick tock hero....
New: the graffitist
and gangs
Pk: Mmmm sorry most of the time that is gangs marking territory.... oh good you got it!
So what happens when you remove a gang tag?
New: I presume they get pissed
Pk: Is that good or bad?
New:I can see where you're going with this
Pk: Are we learning?
New: Indeed.
Pk: So.. how do you have graffiti? It is going to happen right?
New: graffiti? it seems like a neverending problem
Pk: Yes it is.. but if there was a place it could be done.. in a safe environment.. it would cease to be a problem.
New: true enough. but I don't think the people responsible would do it if there was a proper place for it.
it would cease to be fun
Pk: http://www.knowledgerush.com/kr/encyclopedia/Graffiti/
New: thanks for the link. I must read up on this.
Pk: Grass roots movements... take your problem, make others aware, and find a peaceful solution.
And you don't need a mask, or a code name to do it either!
New: thanks for the advice
isn't it against your nature to help superheroes, or is it all part of a larger, more elaborate scheme?...
Pk: Take or leave what you want... it is always your choice.
New: a true statement. thanks for the tips though, seriously.
Pk: Still hate you though.... hero!
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
You will rue many a day!
New: Justice and Truth will prevail.
I'm out...until next time, villain

Please don't club me in the head!

Damnit RLSH you know better then this. Yeah sure why not... hand craft a metal pipe to whap someone in the head that you believe is a wrong doer! Nothing wrong with that what so ever.

Not like you are going out with code names, and protective gear looking to impose your own personal ideas of what you view as a crime and punishment is.

As normal support on the "Beating someone in the head with a home made club" idea was over the top!

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Voodoo Rlsh's Photos - Armory
Fast, strong, billy. Easy to make

Metatron Arc Angel, Skyler Nichols and Rlsh DarkSpartan like this

RedHammer Rlsh what is it bro
Kieran 'Nikoli' Herman its a billycane.
Voodoo Rlsh A Billy is a class of weapon. Examples of billies are asps nightsticks batons and blackjacks. It's just a non-lethal stunning blunt weapon that's very painful ;)
Kieran 'Nikoli' Herman I just call em all billycanes. :D
RedHammer Rlsh nice, how did ya make it, is it easy to hide incase of the coppers
Voodoo Rlsh I keep it concealed. It I used a drum stick. I turn it upside down and wrap it with duct tape. I used random pieces of scrap plastic under the tape to shape the handle.
RedHammer Rlsh wicked
Blue Rlsh I'd stick to the pepper spray and tasers.
Voodoo Rlsh Tonight I'm finishing a taser glove. So I can wear my normal gloves but it can stun ;)
Kieran 'Nikoli' Herman gotta love little inovations.
Voodoo Rlsh Yea haha
RedHammer Rlsh ive tried that but it was either 2 weak er 2 bulky, how did u do urs
Arsenul Rlsh I have two drum sticks I might make a pair of clubs
Arsenul Rlsh If I sent them to you could you make it?

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Well nice to see Master Legend approves of this fun RLSH fashion accessory.. oh and its easy to conceal from the police... that is just nifty as well. And why do you want to carry something on you that you would want to hide from law enforcement... oh yeah that's right... BECAUSE YOU ARE COMMITTING A CRIME!

If anyone who stumbles across these blogs has ever been attacked and beaten by a spandex clad lunatic please let me know. Depending on the location of said attack authorities can be informed of costumed vigilantes in your area.

Operators are standing by.